I woke up early this morning even after a late night of journaling, and looked outside – I think I was expecting the village to look different, as if they were just waiting til the last minute to celebrate Christmas. And it looked... the same. And it broke my heart – not that I miss decorations, but that they don't know Christmas.

Some of us went to the city last night and ended up ordering pizza, and this morning Andrew made us all banana pancakes. We watched the Grinch on Andrew's laptop in the lab, I got a ride back to my house on Duan's moto, and then I'm pretty sure I got a tan while reading the Christmas account. All the while the village never stopped.

Our team and 30 Cambodians – 2 families that are basically family to a lot of us - had dinner together - ham, sweet potatoes, pecan pie, and apple cider! (pics below) Until today its been hard to get into the spirit simply because I haven't been cold, which shows me I evidently require donning a cute toboggan at least once in order to truly want to celebrate the birth of Christ. :) No, seriously, its been hard to even remember Christmas was coming b/c there were no songs on the radio, no commercials with fake snow and great deals, no baking, no Christmas trees, no shopping to do. I take solace in that I am grateful a lot for what Christ did and exemplified when he was here on almost a daily basis, so I don't feel like one specific day might be needed. Not by me anyway.

Some of you that read my blog don't think Jesus Christ was a big deal, and he hasn't impacted your life much, and some of you have prayed with and for me for years. Since the true nature of a blog is to share what you're thinking I would be unfaithful to myself if I didn't voice that he has been my cure-all. (Its on the forefront of my brain almost to the point of tears as an amazing rock remix of O Come All Ye Faithful blares on my ipod.) And not the pale glowing Jesus in stained glass windows, either (I've always thought that guy looked like a wimp; sorry if you have those in your church and I've offended you). The guy who struggled and overcame, the guy who fished with his friends and gave advice that still rings true, the guy who got mad at social injustices and hypocrites, and the guy who said forgiveness of all our crap is key. All that stuff is written down for us to refer back to and study. This time and this move have reminded me that I'm just a regular human with unrealistic expectations and lots of weaknesses but that things are accomplished on lots of levels when you ask God to help. Its too cool.

And that, friend, is the essence of Christmas – we needed God's help and he gave it to us. Awesome.

(also pictured below: my first house guest Frank the ghecko)

This morning at the village coffee shop I watched Yay sit on a tiny stool and wash all the dishes from the morning in a large tub... and I'm wondering what it must be like to do the same monotonous job every day. Not monotony as Americans know it either. Its the same thing I'd have to ask women who sit behind small fruit stands all day hoping for 1 or 2 customers, ladies that push carts all day selling brooms and baskets, and men who's only daily task is to watch their cows graze.

Do they ever say, 'I just need change', 'I don't like my job any more', or 'I feel like I'm not doing anything with my life'? Probably not. Why? Why not?

I think I said that no less than a hundred times in my short career thus far.

Is it that they don't know there's more out there they could do? Are they resigned to do what they know (Cambodians are terrified of making a mistake; they'd rather do nothing than be in error)? Or is it deliberte because they understand it is just a task to be done and they draw satisfaction from how many friends they have, or how they've raised their kids, or how many dishes or cows they've been pleased to purchase...

Just watching her, despite her reasons, this is yet another part of their culture that I admire. To not be defined by what you do or what you have, but rather who you are.

I hope this lesson sinks in to my core and it is who I am as well. Is it cliche? Yes. Cliches are cliche because they have been said a lot. Was I sort of close to this mindset? I hope so, but I've never realized truth before like I have here.

At the risk of being redundant... what fun Saturday and Sunday nights too! Saturday was Madelyn's (MaMa's) 15th birthday party out Ming/my house, and Sunday was a village presentation of the Christmas story.
I helped the women make curry Saturday afternoon - even pressing through getting squirted by chicken juices and my legs falling asleep from sitting indian-style for so long, but it was a bonding experience!! They gave me the jobs of making the cucumber salad and cutting up green beans (string beans here are almost 2' long!), while they mashed and diced and boiled all sorts of other things. 35 of us hung out and talked while kids and kid-like grownups played with balloons in the yard til way after dark.
Sunday evening the children put on a short play at Ming Sarom's house, and there were sandwiches and cokes for all. Most of the crowd that gathered stayed in the back, and many left during or immediately after the play. It maybe have been the most authentic presentation I've ever seen... even if one angel did fall off the back of the stage will bringing good news to the wise men (she was OK, just embarrassed). And as with all Cambodian parties, we danced for the rest of the night.

What a fun Friday night! 4 of us took the staff van into the city at the end of the day, and met up with our other guy Andrew who was already in town. We met at a sort of public square per se - people were doing jazzercise and playing makeshift pickup games of badmitten and soccer – it was too cute. Unlike our potential plan for pizza, we ended up going for Indian cuisine. It was in what I would have considered an ally, full of motos and tuk tuks, but there were cute hotels, guest houses, and shops. We ordered 4 dishes - lentils, eggplant, fried cheese, and potatoes - discussed life, politics and political atmosphere, organ donation, drivers licenses, and watched some Cricket on TV in honor of our friend Rob from Australia.

We had a little time to kill until meeting up with Rob, so we ran some errands, drove past Olympic Stadium, and stopped by a bakery. Even after a long absense away from sweets, the consensus was that everything looked much better than it tasted. We contemplated massages, but decided it was going to take us a while to find Rob anyway, so we headed for Monivong Blvd.

His flat was also back an ally, but super-cute. His roommates just finished their teaching term at a prosthetics school, and they and a few friends were getting ready to leave and travel. They were all super friendly, and all a little bizarre in some way – but hey, maybe we all are :) It was so good to talk to other 20-somethings led to travel. We've concluded that other nationalities travel so much more than Americans - they like history and adventure, whereas Americans may just like.. comfort and relaxation?

There is so much more to people than where they live or what they look like. As diverse as that balcony was tonight, I truly we all want the best for people and understand there's more to life than climbing the ladder.
Very cool night.

First staff meeting today! There were 7 Cambodian department heads (department being a relative term :) ) plus 3 American staff, and 3 long-term volunteers. I officially feel like part of our Team. I had to smile to myself b/c staff meetings are such a foreign concept to them. They like to speak about themselves and take part, but when it comes to listening to others I could tell they were less interested. Which is a cultural thing – they do not take an interest in others b/c in the 70s, 80s, and 90s neighbors, family members, and coworkers were the ones that turned each other in to the Khmer Rouge. Trust and compassion don't really exist here; everyone looks out for themselves. They're the friendliest, most playful people you'll ever meet, but I'm not sure they'd go to bat for each other...

Anywho, I got a brief description of what everyone does, and my own purpose was verified - that I'll be locating what villages we haven't been to or that still have needs, lining up materials and staff/volunteers to go present water quality information, allow for them to purchase water filters, inquire about interest in the other issues we address – rope pumps, arsenic testing, rainwater collection tanks, medical teams, dental clinics, health lessons in schools, and storying – and then schedule and line those up! The goal is consistent presence for 30 months. My first thought? We need more people...

I can't think about how many villages there are – one at a time. If it was a task I could humanly accomplish, I would be able to take all the credit. Just like everything, any success is just my willingness paired with the strength that my Father gives.

Beautiful children, a typical school, internet time!, and my mornings at the coffee shop studying

I woke up early this morning, and not just b/c my electric went out and the fan stopped. There was chanting, which to me almost sounded like a Muslim call to prayer I'd only heard in movies. I remember a coworker saying a monk chants, usually over the wat loudspeaker, only during certain seasons or festivals, so I knew what this meant – the old man that lived near Yien had passed away. He'd been fighting TB and cancer both, and it was a sad sad situation. The old woman won't have the money for the traditional funeral dinner b/c she spent all they had drinking and gambling. Sometimes I could hear them fighting from where I was using the internet. SO sad. I'll get to experience my first Buddhist funeral, up close, or possibly just from a distance. I'd prefer from a distance, to be honest – they've been playing this music all day long that, frankly, sounds like a jack-in-the-box to me.

Thursday was a holiday!!! International Human Rights Day, or something like that. I was still up early... with the chickens... and we endured the 13 km to town for some grocery shopping and errands.
I'm constantly impressed with the organized chaos that is the city streets. Bikes, pedestrians, people pushing carts, big trucks, SUVs all merging and converging with no rhyme or reason. And there's no road rage. Fantastic.
I had the best pizza of my life for lunch at The Pizza Company, picked up a cushion for one of my bamboo chairs, and spent over $60 on 20 items like peanut butter, cereal, juice, toilet paper, tea bags... You can get just about anything... but it'll cost ya!
I was also in search of something Christmas-y even though I know Cambodians don't celebrate Christmas (even the Christians). At all. No songs or parades or family dinners or presents. Not even a wives tale about a character like St Nick. They've never even heard of it! I asked someone on my street if they ever did small presents and their response? Why would I spend money on things we don't need? Great question. I've thought about this all day...
As I was picking out a bike helmet I spotted tinsel at a street vender. Hooray! I paid quite a bit for my tacky tinsel, but its now officially Christmas in the tropics! I put it up as soon as I got home while blaring Christmas music, with an audience of 4 Cambodians. They think its the funniest thing they've ever seen. What do you think?

I don't know that there have been too many Believing weddings, baby dedications, or funerals in this area, but it seems like even the others would enjoy these parties – loud music, good food, and dancing all night. As soon as I got there, Ming took my arm in hers and whisked me away to sit by our lab manager. I didn't have the curry, but I did have 2 bowls of the cabbage and cucumber salad. As I ate I had to laugh to myself that the lord has a sense of humor – in the last week I've eaten chicken right off the bone, stuffed tomatoes, cucumbers in my salad and in my morning eggs, and peppers. All of the foods I despise the most and successfully avoided in America for years. But I've worked up a good spit, smiled, and washed them down with extra lemonade or Coke. He equips the called, for sure.

I'm heading to Siem Reap (home of Anchor Wat) this weekend with the director and his family. His wife and 2 other friends are running the half marathon, he's running the 1 mile kids race with their 5 year old. We won't be touring the magnificent temples, but we'll be seeing some friends, getting massages, and being tourists. I'm hoping we have time for the hot air balloon ride, but we'll see. If you have the chance, you really need to see the temples in northern Cambodia. Or at least google it :) The size and carvings alone are breathtaking. Anchor is the largest religious structure in the world and I think it housed both Hindhu and Buddhist ceremonies over time, but there are hundreds of stone temples to choose from (Bayon and Prohm are the other more popular ones).

I'm also hoping the car ride will be a good time for us to talk about their vision, and how I fit into it once I'm done with language lessons. We're leaving after they finally get a shipping crate bound for the Congo packed with equipment and water filters – word's getting out that these work and others are starting similar filter factories!! Teach people how to fish don't just give them the fish!
Have a good weekend!

Side note: the internet speed here is terrible for uploading pictures. I've tried many many times to upload to facebook or this blog but it times out or malfunctions :) I'll come up with a good way to do this yet!

Today might've been the best day yet simply because I got to do what I alone wanted to do. And not that I didn't want to do what I've previously done, but I spent the whole day going over the language books and study guides given to me. I recopied a few things, read the introductions and tips in another, marked which words I would like to know eventually.... and I did it all in SHORTS in my own home! I forgot how wonderful shorts were after wearing pants and capris for 2 weeks. It was good.

I took a break at lunch to jump on the internet and return a few emails, then back to my house and more reading. Again, at 5:00, from my window, I saw a herd of cattle heading back up the road, done with another day of grazing. And even now, through the noise of 2 fans, I can hear the music starting for the baby shower for Nary. Cambodians are funny people – I don't know if its for show or what but they sure like their music up loud. Last night when my neighbors were selecting music, my entire house was vibrating. Entire businesses are built around people renting blue chairs and large speakers for their weddings, parties, showers, and funerals.

Last week I posted the 2 things I don't like so far? This week, here's what I do like: loud music, friendliness, no city lights impeding watching the stars, little old women with no teeth, walking almost everywhere, flip flops, and fresh fruit every day. And I'm sure my list will grow.

I apologize for not keeping a better blog, but I now think I've learned when the internet may or may not be quirky and when I may or may not have free time. This past week I've found myself taking a tour of the water filter factory on the farm, getting acquainted with the laboratory, organizing my little house, riding along to observe village teaching, taking a ferry across the Mekong River, watching staff teach hygiene in the schools to a room full of 130 5-9 year olds, getting acquainted with RDI staff, and talking with my language tutor. At times I've felt like I was wasting the day away since I didn't come back sweaty and tired, but they're correct that these are necessary steps to truly being affective later. But, truth be told, I'm always tired. Stinkin time change.
Matt (name changed) in our organization has been busy with country government meetings lately so I still don't have a clear-cut vision of what I'll be doing but that's OK. More than likely something to do with community development, filter marketing, youth group, befriending the research staff, revamping village school teaching curriculum and adult storying. Exciting, eh?! I can't even express how excited I still am.
My main focus as of today is to learn the language, although they have said I need to observe and understand every project. They say I'll be miserable and lonely in a few months if I do not learn the language and socialize. I could see that. I know 5 verbs and a hundred nouns, but that won't get me far :) People at the morning “coffeeshop”, passers by on the street, and the family that built me my house are so eager to talk to me and that is my driving motivation. The pained looks on their face when I have to say 'knyum oughdtung' – I don't understand – is so sad.
My house has everything I need now (see pictures), and the Khmer staff is super-friendly. The only “bad” parts of this move have been the pre-dawn roosters outside my window and acclimating to a cold shower. If you come visit and volunteer, don't worry, you'll have warm showers.
The people and the other folks currently here are fantastic and great meal company – 5 countries represented!
So... my daily routine is something like this – roosters start at 4:40, sun comes up around 5:30, up at 6:30, coffeeshop at 7:30, work (“twa-ga”) at 8:30, lunch in the dining hall at noon, return to work at 2:00 which is language lessons until 4:30 for me. The sun goes down at 6:30 and I'm in bed by 9:30. Who says miracles don't happen? Lori's in bed early and up early! haha
I look forward to each day!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

The Khmer were once a magnificent empire, like the Incas. I cannot imagine a sweeter, more hospitable people though. The wars have not broken their spirit. We have always been offered a chair, or tea, or fruit, or a cold cloth. Even from those who had little to give. I am thankful this Thanksgiving to be here - my warmest holiday to date :) I hope I can help someone have reason to be thankful...

For any UST folks and Mike Barnes...

Here's a common sight - selling out of a barrel. Think there's spill prevention on this? Notice the "gas station attendant" is asleep - lol
Mike, my first home! Thanks for your help!

Cambodia is exactly like I left it - maybe more built up in some areas of the city and more poor out in the villages. Some quick facts: 40% of the population lives below the poverty line; around 70% can't read; and the average family makes $275 a year. But to quote Francis Chan, 'When you've actually hugged poverty, and laughed with poverty, that's different. You're different. Its no longer distant people that are starving, its your friends.' And its true.
There aren't any volunteer teams in, but there are 7 funny, quality, scientific folks from 4 countries in doing various research so our mealtimes are a blast. I'm still getting oriented and setting up my language lessons so I don't have many stories. Most of my stories include wondering around to look at projects, meeting old friends, and going to the city or market to get various things for my little house. But tomorrow may be a different story - we're killing our own turkeys to prepare for Thanksgiving!
I'll try to post pictures of a few things soon, but the internet is quirky (I don't have it at my house - I'm using the office wireless from the dining hall.) I'm not quite over jet lag, so its 8pm and I'm headed to bed! We have this all nat-ur-al alarm clock with built in snooze... Ming's chickens start at 4:30, restart at 5:30, and go strong at 6:30. I guess I'm meant to be a morning person after all. Ugh :)

First leg is completed - onto Cambodia tonight

If anyone has cause to travel Asiana Airlines I highly recommend it. They were the most friendly and helpful people to 2 semi-clueless Americans!
We left our small cheering crowd at the Louisville airport at 7:10pm Wednesday, and arrived in Chicago only to sit and wait for the transit desk to open. One can't help but feel almost insignificant as you watch hundreds of different ethnicities swirl around you in a place like that. We were so looking forward to having a good "last meal" in America, but everything was closed once we got through security! So a snack it was.
We boarded a packed 747 at 1am, enjoyed numerous movies, 2 yummy meals - well I had one meal and slept through the other one - and conversation with our neighbor from NY, and almost 15 hours later arrived in a cold, foggy Korea.
Our friends that were to give us a tour of the city couldn't make it after all, so we're currently entertaining ourselves in the airport for the duration of the 11-hour layover. Suggestions? We've alreay exhausted the 'where do you think that traveler is from' game, and visited the closest McDonalds (I know, we're such Americans...).
So there's the narration of my journey and on a personal note... I'm feeling inadequate. Which in turn creates an awareness of how much His strength and not my own is the key to success, for this venture, but also life in general. The butterflies and nausea are gone, but the excitement remains. Some things we do in life are still hard even when we know that is the path laid out or planned for us - changing jobs, moving, quitting jobs, divorce, love. We will botch it up if we get our hands too far into the situation - 'man determines his path but the lord determines his steps'. Let a strength that is beyond yours guide your steps to do the hard things.

I've walked over to my closet... and looked in... then walked over to the dresser... and opened one drawer. Stood in the middle of my room and looked around, and then laid on the bed with my feet up on the wall. For all my excitement to leave, I can't seem to pack.

My thoughts lately have been for those I will encounter - the little old ladies that are slightly hunched over, the older men who stand curiously at a distance, and little kids who can't hang onto you any tighter... and I'm humbled. Now more than ever.

This is my time. My calling. My opportunity. Its funny to look back and see how frustrated I was with God for not opening doors to do this sooner - but a lot of things and situations had to happen. So this is perfect timing as always, imagine that. A lot if not all of the pillars that form my life come from the Bible, and here is what has been running through my mind for the last few weeks-

'Suppose someone needs food or clothing, and you say 'well good-bye and God bless you, stay warm and eat well!' but then you don't give that person any food or clothing. What good does that do?' (James 2:15-16)

I'm moving to a place where the need is for water and food. Awesome. I've got a tangible form of love for a tangible need.

We get so wrapped up in our phrases - you doin good? how are you? take care! - that we don't actually SEE the person we're talking to. What if they can't take care? What if they're not 'good' like they responded? What are you going to do about it?

Or then there's this to mull over - 'to know what you ought to do and not do it is wrong' (James 4:17). Talk about conviction.

So I'm humbled - I get to do what I ought to do. I love it already.

Ta-da!

I am now blogging! I hope you enjoy reading along as I (hopefully) will relay a lot of trying and rewarding experiences, and introspective thoughts.
I'll start out with something obvious, and leave the profound for later -

I'm leaving Louisville KY on Wednesday Nov 18 bound for warmer weather via Chicago and Seoul South Korea. I'll arrive Phnom Penh (pronounced pnom pen) at 11pm Friday. Cambodia is 12 hours ahead of the eastern time zone.

To move and love people was the easiest decision I've ever had to make. This is gonna be awesome...