If you could see the hopelessness and frustration with Buddhism you'd celebrate this even more!

Peace! Love! Burdens lifted! Joy! 

A common statement is 'I feel there is light in my life now!'

I wasn't there, nor do I know the semi-dry and stiff narrator :)  but I celebrate this down to my toes!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTo7fEVsIzI

*let me know if this link doesn't work

If you could see the hopelessness and frustration with Buddhism you'd celebrate this even more!

Peace! Love! Burdens lifted! Joy! 

A common statement is 'I feel there is light in my life now!'

I wasn't there, nor do I know the semi-dry and stiff narrator :)  but I celebrate this down to my toes!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTo7fEVsIzI

*let me know if this link doesn't work

For months I prepared and prayed and waited.  Then I finally got to share the gospel with Leang. But it was a train wreck. (That's for another time...)

Here's the bizarre part of the evening ::  I assumed there would be a deep connection to her husband of 10 years that passed away, and I could use that as a baseline. Let me explain...

I had a dream that he - Viesna - asked me 'did you tell my family what I know yet?" There was some back and forth, but in the end, he meant the gospel.  It was the most real dream I may have ever had. (And additionally we never knew if he believed or not. Interesting on all accounts.) Anyway,...

it was a prodding I needed. I've always been scared of the aunt and gramma who are devout otherwise. But here was my approach since Cambodians deeply believe in dreams
and the meanings behind them:
'I dreamt about Viesna and I want to tell you about it.'

Background: 

Viesna - my coworker for 5 years and helpful big brother - was shy but genuine. Soft-hearted.
He soaked up stories of Jesus, but couldn't process the hypocrisy of others. 

He loved the idea of a loving God, and even read through several books in the Bible, but feared a Sunday worship experience where others might judge or approach him.  

He threw out idols from the house, but told gramma he wouldn't convert so her heart wouldn't break. 

I rarely heard him raise his voice at home, and he loved spending time with his son, which is rare. 

You can see why I assumed they had a good relationship to the point 

she'd want to "hear from him". 

The day arrives when I've asked her to come to my house out of earshot of everyone else.  I'd practiced my words, I'd written and re-written what I would say, starting with the dream. I'd enlisted people to pray. I'd envisioned her hanging on my words as I talked about her husband of 10 years and then a full-on gospel summary. I estimated her questions and reactions.

I thought there'd be interest.
Nope.

Ironic, because gramma and I talk a lot about who dreamt about him & when, and what it means. 

Her (apparent?) lack of interest in him and in the gospel nearly took my breath away....tears... frustration....(not in front of her, or course).

It could be a coping thing? My prayer is that something resonated. 

So now as a sidebar I beg these questions about arranged marriages, intimacy, loyalty, emotions, connection in a society that is a dichotomy of community-oriented with family priorities yet very individualistic....

I finished my last day seconded (can you be seconded if you don't have a sending agency? maybe not) to Alongsiders International (www.alongsiders.org).  

That's a short and sweet sentence, but it was pretty rough to see the end of the 2 year stint. Without a doubt, friendships there will last a lifetime, but leave a void on a daily basis for now.

I'm not a kids person, but I whole heartedly embrace their value and imagery of God. They should be fought for, protected, and raised better than many find themselves stuck in.

I love that the office moved to a bigger space (albeit too far away for me to commute to). 

I love that they started in Vietnam, Senegal, Rwanda, and Kenya this year. I love that Pakistan hit 20 participants after much struggle, and that Cambodia tops the scales at over a thousand now.

I love that conversations are happening to help children and disciple teens in the Middle East soon.

I love the testimonies of young adults who were once being raised by a neighbor that treated them 

as free labor instead of a child that now say 'someone asked me to be their "little sister" 

and that changed my life'. 

Go, Alongsiders, go. 

And to the big brothers and big sisters checking on that 1 child in your neighborhood - showing love to a child as Jesus has shown love to you - go, alongsiders, go!

I've taken the approach to heart and have been walking with a few kids in my village. These faces.


So!  I'll be working in my village and the 2 surrounding ones - teaching, helping, providing, loving.

The monks and the village leader want to learn computer and English skills and my name came up. Well, I can't say no to that now can I?

The 2 local free-for-all dumps, some needed toilets, needed connections to water, some needed life skills  are also on my radar and immediate schedule. Oh, and I'm teaching 2 ladies to drive :)

In 2017 I'll incorporate something more.... reading, processing, praying over the next chapter - the US is my destination spring of 2017.  Yes, this chapter is ending.  (Good gosh, even to type that made my eyes water! This is gonna be rough.)  

Please don't ask what's next - if I knew I'd type it out here. haha  And if I knew now it'd be a distraction anyway, God will show me later. I want to be fully present here until the final day.

Last push. Finish well. All in. My best for His glory.

You may have heard me say I love the aspect that I'm a liaison - I relay things back and forth between new and mature believers, between 3rd and developed worlds, between Asian and Western contexts. 

I can't not share this one. 

Last week I heard a story - I saw part of a story - that rocked my world! 

I got chills then, I've got chills now as I type.

Pheakra (pek-raa) was a 21 year old Alongsider in Kampong Thom province. His "little brother" Thouith (do-it) lives alone with his gramma and he got to see the ocean for the first time at last year's camp where they both attended. 

For the last few months Pheakra was talking to his brother older brother about wanting to live for God more.  He just didn't know how.  He was tired of social injustices, drinking, gambling, and lack of faith in his village and family. Shortly after, he had a very real dream that lasted for 2 nights - Pheakra was with God and His angels - asking questions, worshiping, playing. 

The dream came to and end and Pheakra begged to stay with God. But God showed him 

his village and said he needed to go back. 

After the dream, it was second nature - as his brother tells the story - for Pheakra to talk about 'the real god', to sit with others, to hug (what?!), to pray with folks, to encourage a new faith most in his village had never heard of. And he was winning people over. "He was fully in love with God 

and able to tell anyone about Him" his brother told us. 

A very cool God-moment had happened. 

Notice I've been using past tense. Last Tuesday Pheakra was killed suddenly when he was 

struck by lightning herding the family's cattle in for the evening.  'runtaya bine'

(~100 Cambodians die of lightning strikes every year)

You can imagine the number of people asking why and spewing anger at God. A life gone at 21. 

The story continues.... 

An uncle lay awake the night before the funeral praying, but praying in anger. 

"Why didn't You stop this from happening to our family? 

What will we do now without the money from him working?

He was being salt and now won't grow up and get married!" he said. 

He fell asleep with tears in his eyes and anger in his heart. And he dreamed.... 

...his nephew was in heaven with a few others he recognized. He was laughing and worshiping, and when he saw his uncle he demanded he not be angry with God - rebuked him even and said he had little faith. The uncle tried to drag him back to earth, but Pheakra would not go, saying that his job 

in the village was done and that he wanted so badly to remain with God. 

The uncle shared this dream with everyone he saw, and peace & laughter abounded. It trampled a huge portion of grief right then and there.  

Smiles. Even at the funeral service. 

Thousands attended a funeral that should've been attended by hundreds to hear the 

testimonies of the brother and the uncle. 

They've recorded the testimonies of these 2 and put it on youtube so that the message of God can keep going.  (they've labeled it in Khmer so I'm still looking for it to pass on...)

And it is.  

God speaks to Cambodians in their dreams all the time.  I. love. this. I love it!

I love that the approach is different. Specific even, to the child. 

I love that God shows his power. 

I love that every time He does it creates a wave of faith.

I love that His character is consistent even though his approach seems unknown to me. 

I've never drempt of God. But maybe I didn't need to. He is what his children need him to be. 

And its all for His glory. 

Pray that the God of the harvest will speak in our dreams. Your dreams. 

Look who now has an 'Alongsider' walking with them in life?!  These 3!

Would you have walked past them in their less then clean clothes on the street? Shoo-ed them away from your table or car window if they were begging? Do they look too stereotypical for you to care? 

Well, they're being loved on and mentored by these 3 God-fearing men.

 

Would you have picked them out as believers, or if you met them would you hold your purse tighter?  (One is a pastor, pick which one.)

If you're like me, your concept or perception of the international church was this:

present, yet vague

Well these 3 men tangibly love God and signed on to mentoring 3 young orphans they knew from their neighborhood. It challenges my perception which could have even been a stereotype. Even when you're poor, you've got energy, wisdom, knowledge, hugs, advice, laughter, prayer, and time to give. No money required. Everything to gain.

You can't beat that with a stick.

The church is being a Body that reaches out and not just gathers together.  Does yours? Do you?  Do you love others like you love your own kids? Do you care for the widows and orphans? Do you even know a vulnerable child you could check on?

After a year of lots of interest in other places but no one pulling the trigger to implement the Alongsiders concept, 2016 been a great ride and we're only halfway done! Churches are using the Alongsiders concept and comic book curriculum to reach vulnerable children and teach young folks how to disciple someone in:

Rwanda

Pakistan

China

Kenya

Senegal

Myanmar

and Thailand votes soon on using our comic books as a curriculum in their youth groups.

Our website now has an alongsiders "academy" where folks can learn our vision, hear our methods, and complete modules in 12 languages! (part of the translation and set up was my work load earlier - whew!)

 Stay tuned for more blog posts with pics from Indonesia and Pakistan!

You'll never guess who our intern is!  I'll give you hints. Her relative is:

Fleming.  Pete Fleming. 

Don't know him?

Think Ecuador.

Now?

Ecuador in the 1950s. He and 4 other good friends.  

They didn't come home alive. 5 missionaries were killed by the Huaorani people.

His granddaughter is our intern for the next 6 months!! I hosted her at my house last weekend since her host in the city was giving birth.  We talked about sociology, love, college, road trips, Cambodian culture, callings, and God.  We stayed up late in our hammocks with a pizza and popcorn. We rode around on Molly-Moto to see rice fields and ferry crossings, buy sugarcane juice, and chat with neighbors. We shared about our experiences with missions - good and bad - and family influences.

She never once named names or bragged when she told of going with a large group for a reunion in Ecuador when she was 10, returning once to see friends, or later skyping with people who had to take dugout canoes to a city 3 hours away to get internet.

It took me 3 days to put the pieces together.

She said sometimes she hates the affiliation because then she's no longer just her, she's the story. 

I get that.  On a much smaller scale, I'd give anything if on furlough I wasn't Lori that works in Cambodia, but just Lori.

“You didn’t come when I was sick. I wondered where you were.”   My stomach flopped and I had to catch my breath. 

My favorite gramma said this to me this week when I stopped by.

I listened to her explain how she had to have 4 bags of serum but that they never knew what was wrong (ugh) and inside I was aching.  For 2 reasons:

1) I missed out on the opportunity to show love and compassion and support, 

but, hey wait!,

2) I’m still not ‘one of them’. 

No one called. No one came for me, or sent for me. We're only 24 houses apart. About a football field. 

'Her god has been known to heal people.'  
'We know she prays to the Creator god a lot.'  
'She’s been a part of our family for years.'  
'We need someone else to take a shift just like she did when Viesna died last year.'  
Was any of this said? 

But no matter how many wedding road trips, late night laughs, market trips, or afternoons in the shade ... we’re miles apart sometimes.

Lesson to be applied: see or be seen at least every other day :)  

(NOTE: at times some folks really get tickled and say I AM one of them... my moto instead of a car, no AC, $1 Cambodian shoes, ability to make Khmer food, etc. Sweet moments.)

What a fantastic, stupendous policy!!

My friends work for Servants Ministries.  And they have a policy. A policy that says their folks must stay at or below the standard of living of those they're serving.

I absolutely love this.

I love it because I hear the talk about "rich foreigners", I (and others) get offered children to take them to "a better place", and I see the look on their faces when they perceive we're not the same, worlds apart.

(And coincidentally people seem tickled when I say I don't have AC, or a car, or a house helper, or a driver.  To be perceived as "regular" is utmost to me - walking with them is easier when you're not also walking across a chasm that's separating you too.)

I know many organizations and folks would disagree - that it doesn't make a difference - but I'm one who stands by this particular idea.

I spent a few days at my friends' house in a slum community by the city's open sewer while they were away.  I didn't feel threatened, I didn't get sick. I enjoyed their banter, and had perfectly fine running water.

There was a window pane missing in the door - no problem. There was trash everywhere outside - no problem.  The ally smelled like urine - no problem.  The upstairs neighbor's drain ran into the propped open manhole in front of our door - no problem.

We yelled at kids the same way. We laughed at things the same way. We stood up, stretched and popped our backs the same way.

While possibly intimidating to walk into at first, after 5 minutes its hard to imagine having the nerve to say, 'I'm sorry, I'm better than this and I don't want to live and love incarnationally.'  (Yes that's a massive blanket statement - I'll leave it at that knowing there's a whole lot that could be unpacked on both sides. I like to do that sometimes :)  )

I'll keep this short and leave off at that festering last statement.  I'm not saying I'm moving to a slum.

I am however saying its necessary and not as bad as one might think.

As those of us who follow Jesus surrender and mature into being more Christ-like we can say, like Paul, after we've tried, stayed at, and done bizarre things for His glory '.. I've learned how to get along happily whether I have a lot or a little. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I've learned the secret of living in every situation..'  Philippians 4:12  And it was worth it.

My "job" trajectory is taking a new course.  I've had a good conversation with my "boss" - a meeting of the minds.

I've served with Alongsiders International (www.alongsiders.org) since Nov 2014.  I've seen God's hand:

- in my own heart as I meet mentors (Alongsiders) and current and former Little Brothers and Sisters,
- in India, Indonesia, and Cambodia as more and more kids have hope and someone walking with them,
- allow my boss to speak at major 4/14 or World Without Orphans conferences to share his God-given vision for caring for vulnerable children,
- expanding and rooting this movement even without our help in Rwanda, Myanmar, Senegal, China, and Pakistan!

Its been a ride! 

And I've worked myself out of a job.

I've taught Karuna - our spunky admin assistant that couldn't afford college but is making herself indispensable based on her abilities instead of book smarts - to run reports, renew insurances, update job descriptions, track receipts, and make better tea and coffee to name a few :)

And I've walked with Darath - our young, lovable office manager - how to create and do staff evaluations, make a budget, use google calendar, and manage his time better. 

Excellent!

So I've been asked to switch to just 10% admin oversight and 90% capacity building. Based on my relationships with staff and language ability he wants them to learn computer, life, health, and spiritual skills that will improve them for their days to come.  

I LOVE this and I'll have to narrow down the 1000 things I want to share.  The window for this is now til August, when the office moves another hour further from my house. And after August?  

Well.  We'll seek God and see.  

    One generation away. From many things, but today in this way.... weaker faith. 

I   I was invited to the engagement ceremony of a neighbor and friend.  She has helped put herself through college, is the 5th of 6 kids, and loves to teach kids Bible songs and Bible stories.

    Her parents have arranged for her to marry a non-Christian. And she’s agreed. Let me note there are several, multiple factors in this, most importantly that in Khmer culture you’re never outside of the influence of your parents no matter the age.

But still. My mind is processing this...

She’s the 3^rd of a handful of ladies lately that love the Lord and have been praying and waiting for a godly husband, yet have accepted their parents' introductions.  

"Do not be unequally yoked.” 

There is an initial disappointment in my (western) heart – that they won’t immediately know the joy of being joined to and in a partnership with a godly leader of their family of 2. But we'll pray hard that this happens. 

Then, there is the point in the conversation where they say ‘but Lori I’ve already talked to him and he says my belief is no problem.’  And while this is a half of a check mark – at least he’s not upset you have a different religion from him – its not a full check mark.

Continuing, ‘… and Lori he says he’ll go to church with me after a year or so.’  Again. The check mark is half drawn based on a promise.

Today I'm talking about faith. It will sound dramatic to some, but its true when 2 opposite opinions or lifestyles join in any capacity. The odds are good that the the majority of the time the joint lifestyle leans the way of the "weaker" link. Nutrition. Travel and socializing. Faith. Spending habits. Savings. Disciplining children.

Their kids will be quick to see the difference in mom and in dad. 

"Do not be unequally yoked, but if you are...."  We're not just left with a command. We're left with a path. 

Hear that I'm not advocating disobedience to parents. 

I am saying that life isn’t cut and dry. I'm saying God understands the thousands of cultures He created. 

And I will pray for heaps of blessings and faith be heaped on these two - that this was a divine appointment from the beginning of time for this fellow to hear Christ's love for the first time. 

Life was incredibly hard when we all were asked to move on from our former NGO in 2014. It was a point of anger, a point of confusion, a point of isolation. A chance to be humbled and seek His face and learn grace and walk in faith when we couldn't see the road.

Sidebar:  I can finally now say I pray for them semi-frequently and wish them the very best - an answer to a personal prayer. Thanks for the healing, God. It was all You. 

The 7 of us literally scattered the globe: 

2 returned home to retire, 

1 is teaching English north of the city, 

1 moved to Myanmar,

I’m of course with Alongsiders, 

and now I can say that the remaining 2 got re-assigned to an 

unreached people group in Russia! 

This new news, while fun to live vicariously through, has brought up old and new feelings alike. My overwhelming and understated thought today is this – 'deep sigh'.

Of the top 20 stresses in life, I’m told folks abroad like us live under 13 pretty consistently. Ouch.  How did folks who struck out on their own like Gladys Aylsward do it?

We especially need community, accountability, and encouragement… and when that’s disrupted by losing a confidante and neighbor we hit yet another wall we’ll scale with God’s sweet tenderness and strength.

Wall # 787 hit - check.

But let’s end on a high note – after they learn the language for a year or so there will be one less un-reached people group in the world! 

Plus I've always wanted to go to Russia! Hosts?  :)  

God, protect them as they go and start over. Give their children belonging and new friends. Open their minds to another new language. Introduce them to people of peace and divine appointments. Bless their efforts, keep them humble, and acclimate them quickly. Give them love for those around them as they learn in the city, and later for their people group. And may what they did in Cambodia still impact hearts and bear fruit in the years to come. 

Christian culture. Christian cliches. They drive me absolutely nuts sometimes.

I'm processing out loud today.

Today's ponderance:  "be a light"

I've said it. I've prayed it. I've encouraged it.  What the heck does it mean?

Specifically I just got back from Pursat province in the west with this lovely bunch - a family that has taken me in and taught me to cook and swear and love. My friend that passed away last year was in this family, and even though he was the glue that sometimes got me invited, we've grown closer since his passing.

It was my first ever overnight road trip with a group that didn't speak any English. It was also my first night sleeping as Khmer sometimes do - all together, with no mattress, and outside.

As a side note, I promise there were an equal amount of men present besides the groom but they already got a table to start the highly anticipated drinking portion of the evening.

Jesus was sometimes direct, sometimes expository, sometimes rhetorical, and sometimes allegorical.  "Don't hide the light you have under a shrub...", "...let your light shine before others...", "...believe in the Light so that you are then children of that Light...".   You still have to figure out the tangible aspects on your own.

And it can vary. Can't it?

You know what a light wasn't necessarily? Turning down beer, or being friendly. Two very common occurrences even in people with "no light".

Two very common ideals of other followers of Jesus that will surely show the world their light.

This group I was with will mention even in casual conversation "darkness". Its common in Cambodia. They have a sense of dark. Darkness.  Being a light should be easy then, eh?  Hm.

I know a lot of answers in my head, but I'm not going to type those out - I'm going to leave this open-ended and invasive.

How do you be a light?

I have an idea that "light" isn't recognized as quickly as we'd like to think sometimes. It takes more intentional effort.

Drums from the wat.... fighting at my neighbor's house.... dogs barking... moto engines being pieced back together by would-be mechanics revving down the road...the strong smell of everyone burning their daily trash... a funeral playing mournful, horrible music down the road... swatting mosquitoes sitting by a fan....

To some this is an eclectic, attractive part of this mysterious life called missions. And there is an assumption that I've embraced it.

"Oh, I couldn't do it!"  I've heard more than I care to. Its offensive to me more than its the intended compliment.

We do what we do when God says to do it.  We don't know how. We just crawl or inch forward. To say you can't or wouldn't is.... its.... well, its hard to narrate.

I can't do this either.

None of us is super natural.  None of us is super spiritual.  We just do.  We abide.

Have you ever ended a relationship God told you to end, or quit a perfectly good job, or taken out a whopping loan for your new business adventure?  Shew, I could never do that.

See?  We do hard things when there's an unction in our spirit.

There is an Ultimate source of strength. A source of redemption.  Of changed lives.  Of new chapters, and of triumph over loneliness, addiction, confusion, and mediocrity.

We try.

And to not try and laugh it off, well, to me - in any book across the board - is a failure.

So, please don't say you could never do this to a girl that tends to periodically plead for more workers in the field. It breaks my heart.

2015 was a year of no blogs....  a year where I felt I didn't have much to say.... a year where I didn't even know my own thoughts let alone how to convey them.  If you kept checking back - thank you.

I could write about the furlough the last 2 months in the US.  Or I could write today about re-acclimating.  Or even the new work I've been doing in the last year. But I won't.

Today my thought is about a guy I shared a table with at breakfast, which isn't uncommon when you're pressed for space in Asia.  I don't see that carrying over to America well.

The first few minutes are always rough with a new person as they figure out my version of Lori-style Khmer language.  As they figure out where they can laugh and where they can make eye contact with a foreigner.

Halfway done with soup, he says he's the oldest of 5 and that he's hoping God helps him find a new job.  I ask if he knows God.  He says yes.  I ask how.

If you've got a pretty good memory and are keen to look up Asian news you'll remember that in 2011 there was a stampede in Phnom Penh that killed hundreds. It was preventable, horrible, and latter gruesome as they showed bodies on local news so the families would recognize them and come claim them.

He was in that group, stuck on a bridge.  He'd heard of a God that loved him after soccer games on a local church team, but didn't really care.  "It didn't impact my heart"

The night of the stampede being pressed down from all directions he remembered that 'God can give you strength when you're weak'.

"I didn't have breath, but in my mind I screamed for God to give me strength because I was so weak and stuck. And all of a sudden I had strength. My mind got clearer, I had more breath, and I pushed out of the pile, lifting those on top of me off and over, helping them too. I pulled more with me and walked away. I knew that night there was a God, that he'd saved me from death, and I wanted to know about Him."

I love stories like this. I'm pressed to pass them on.  Real. Practical. Undeniable. Efficient. Lovely. If you need God today, ask Him.