For months I prepared and prayed and waited.  Then I finally got to share the gospel with Leang. But it was a train wreck. (That's for another time...)

Here's the bizarre part of the evening ::  I assumed there would be a deep connection to her husband of 10 years that passed away, and I could use that as a baseline. Let me explain...

I had a dream that he - Viesna - asked me 'did you tell my family what I know yet?" There was some back and forth, but in the end, he meant the gospel.  It was the most real dream I may have ever had. (And additionally we never knew if he believed or not. Interesting on all accounts.) Anyway,...

it was a prodding I needed. I've always been scared of the aunt and gramma who are devout otherwise. But here was my approach since Cambodians deeply believe in dreams
and the meanings behind them:
'I dreamt about Viesna and I want to tell you about it.'

Background: 

Viesna - my coworker for 5 years and helpful big brother - was shy but genuine. Soft-hearted.
He soaked up stories of Jesus, but couldn't process the hypocrisy of others. 

He loved the idea of a loving God, and even read through several books in the Bible, but feared a Sunday worship experience where others might judge or approach him.  

He threw out idols from the house, but told gramma he wouldn't convert so her heart wouldn't break. 

I rarely heard him raise his voice at home, and he loved spending time with his son, which is rare. 

You can see why I assumed they had a good relationship to the point 

she'd want to "hear from him". 

The day arrives when I've asked her to come to my house out of earshot of everyone else.  I'd practiced my words, I'd written and re-written what I would say, starting with the dream. I'd enlisted people to pray. I'd envisioned her hanging on my words as I talked about her husband of 10 years and then a full-on gospel summary. I estimated her questions and reactions.

I thought there'd be interest.
Nope.

Ironic, because gramma and I talk a lot about who dreamt about him & when, and what it means. 

Her (apparent?) lack of interest in him and in the gospel nearly took my breath away....tears... frustration....(not in front of her, or course).

It could be a coping thing? My prayer is that something resonated. 

So now as a sidebar I beg these questions about arranged marriages, intimacy, loyalty, emotions, connection in a society that is a dichotomy of community-oriented with family priorities yet very individualistic....